The yellow flowers

Being a mom is really hard, I'm finding out. It's physically demanding, mentally exhausting, and emotionally challenging. I suppose it will always be that way. From the minute those labour pains started to the day I die, it has been and will always be that way, to some degree or another.

That's not to say motherhood isn't wonderful. It's sort of like growing a garden. You put your heart and soul into it, you work hard at it, you love it and tend to it. And some days you are rewarded with beautiful blossoms that you can stand back and marvel at, proud that you actually grew something so lovely. And other days you do nothing but hunch and strain over that garden, pulling weed after weed, battling with the garden that seemed like such a great idea back in the spring. At the end of the day you are exhausted. But overall, you love gardening and would never give it up.

It's the same with children. You want to give your children so much, as much as you possibly can. You love them, care for them, nurture them in so many ways. And most days their shining faces just light up your day. And you think that this is really all you need in life. But there are moments, difficult moments, that make you question yourself and your decision to be a parent. At the end of the day you are exhausted, but you love being a mother with your whole being and could never dream of another life.

It's Mother's Day and I got the most lovely gift from Kaylin this afternoon--a beautiful bouquet of dandylions she picked from our neighbour's boulevard. While the rest of us see weeds, my little girl sees pretty yellow flowers. And for the first time, I saw pretty yellow flowers too.

Happy Mother's Day.