Sunday, May 10, 2009

The yellow flowers

Being a mom is really hard, I'm finding out. It's physically demanding, mentally exhausting, and emotionally challenging. I suppose it will always be that way. From the minute those labour pains started to the day I die, it has been and will always be that way, to some degree or another.

That's not to say motherhood isn't wonderful. It's sort of like growing a garden. You put your heart and soul into it, you work hard at it, you love it and tend to it. And some days you are rewarded with beautiful blossoms that you can stand back and marvel at, proud that you actually grew something so lovely. And other days you do nothing but hunch and strain over that garden, pulling weed after weed, battling with the garden that seemed like such a great idea back in the spring. At the end of the day you are exhausted. But overall, you love gardening and would never give it up.

It's the same with children. You want to give your children so much, as much as you possibly can. You love them, care for them, nurture them in so many ways. And most days their shining faces just light up your day. And you think that this is really all you need in life. But there are moments, difficult moments, that make you question yourself and your decision to be a parent. At the end of the day you are exhausted, but you love being a mother with your whole being and could never dream of another life.

It's Mother's Day and I got the most lovely gift from Kaylin this afternoon--a beautiful bouquet of dandylions she picked from our neighbour's boulevard. While the rest of us see weeds, my little girl sees pretty yellow flowers. And for the first time, I saw pretty yellow flowers too.

Happy Mother's Day.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

There is nothing like a beautiful bouquet of yellow flowers. I just love your stories.
Hugs to everyone
Debbie

Jo said...

Char....what a wonderful comparison to make. I have a fantastic picture book called Mrs. Spitzer's Garden that compares teaching to gardening. Your class every year is like a package of seeds, ready to bloom. Some grow quickly, others need more time, some are brightly coloured, others keep their heads hidden - gorgeous pictures and a lovely idea. What a sweet present from Kaylin...even sweeter was your appreciation and reaction. I am going to be turning to you one day for motherly advice and wisdom...you seem to do a really great job!

Anonymous said...

WOW..so beatifully written..and oh so true!!
Andrea

PS. Maks looks soooo big on that picture!! He is growing like a weed (wink)!LOL

Brenda said...

Char, just when I feel that I'm all alone in what I'm thinking and feeling, you write something wonderful on your blog, letting me know you're right there with me.
Thank you.