Dear people who make baby socks,Are you kidding me? Do you people actually sleep at night knowing that the little pink socks you manufacture each day never really serve their purpose? How can you look in the mirror when you know full well that the tiny toe covers you produce never really stay on said toes?
On behalf of all mothers everywhere, let me say that I am quite disappointed in all of you. Baby socks do not stay on!
You should be paying me to be searching the floor every half hour for those little tubes of stretchy cotton! I should send you an invoice for all the time I spend putting those socks back on my baby's adorable feet. And what about all the time I waste smooching those little exposed piggly-wigglies when your stinky socks fall off? You owe me big time!
I hope that this letter makes you stop and think about yourselves and the injustice you create in this world on a daily basis. You should be ashamed.
Yours truly,
Charlene
PS - And why do newborn socks have treads on them? Where exactly is my baby going in those treads that I don't know about?
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ONTARIO
SUPERIOR COURT OF JUSTICE
JANUARY 16, 2006
ORDER
UPON THE MOTION of Acme Baby Sock & Shoe Company, heard on the 16th day of January, 2006, and upon reading the Affidavit of Dr. Robert Jones, pediatrician; upon hearing submissions of counsel for Acme Baby Sock & Shoe Company; having determined that baby socks are fit for the ordinary purpose for which they are intended and sold in a commercially reasonable manner;
IT IS HEREBY ORDERED that Charlene Garside shall cease and desist from publishing any comments, remarks, statements, admonitions, announcements, cautions, caveats, circulars, declarations, clues, opinions , critiques, cues, declarations, directives, instructions, manifestos, advertisements, advice, memos, notes, proclamations, reviews, warnings, communications, or criticisms, of any kind, by way of Blog or otherwise, regarding baby socks until further order of this Court.
HONOURABLE MADAM JUSTICE JUDY SMITH
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