Tales from the crib

Kaylin is getting her “big girl bed” today! So exciting to watch my daughter move from her baby crib to her toddler twin! Maybe she’ll be one of those kids I always hear about who don’t even know they can get out of their bed without mommy or daddy. This is going to be great!

4pm: I showed Kaylin her newly-delivered bed and let her jump on the mattress, hoping she will get excited about the concept of her big bed. Yayy, big girl bed!

6:30pm: We had “big girl bed day” cupcakes to celebrate the special occasion. Sweet and delicious.

7:30pm: Hmmm, maybe not such a good idea to fuel the toddler with sugar before bedtime.

7:40pm: Brian dismantles the crib and we wave “goodbye” to it. Kaylin doesn’t seem to mind that her crib is out of the room. Gee, she’s so easy going.

7:45pm: The new bed is set up! Hmmm, also maybe not a good idea to encourage the toddler to jump on her bed. She seems to think it’s a trampoline. Oh well, I’m sure she’ll figure it out.

7:50pm: I let Kaylin pick the sheets for her new bed. She picks the all pink ones. Well, not the ones I would have chosen, but, what the heck, she’s a big girl now!

8pm: Put Kaylin to bed. She’s not asleep yet, but she looks pretty drowsy. I’m sure it will be a matter of minutes.

8:01pm: Kaylin ran out of her room. Ha ha, isn’t that cute? She’s so grown up! I gently escort her back to bed.

8:01:45pm: Kaylin ran out of her room again. Hmmmm, this isn’t going as well as I had hoped. I give her a serious gaze and escort her back to her bed.

8:03pm: Kaylin came out of her room and asks me to rock her in the rocking chair. Hmm, well, I guess I can do that. I do like rocking her. Ok!

8:10pm: I rock her for a few minutes and lie her in the bed. She looks like she’s going to go to sleep. That wasn’t too bad, but I mustn’t rock her tomorrow! Must help her to sleep on her own. Must must must!

8:11pm: Kaylin came out of her room. Gee, I sure would like to go watch some TV. The Fall line-up’s starting, you know. I sternly say, “Back to bed Kaylin!” and watch her jump into bed. Good, she’s starting to get the idea.

8:15pm: Kaylin comes out of her room. Sigghhhh, this isn’t fun at all. I’m starting to miss the crib already. We really shouldn’t have had those cupcakes. I escort her back to bed.

8:19pm: Kaylin stands at her door, calling for me. This really isn’t going well. I’m desperate. I offer to lie in bed with her for a few minutes, just to help her get settled. I won’t do this every night, just tonight. Hmmm, these pink sheets are really soft. Oh, and this is a great pillow. I should buy one for myself. Maybe it will help if I pretend to go to sleep. Yeah, that should work. I’ll just close my eyes for a sec......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

There are no words

I've been in a bit of a slump lately, feeling sorry for myself and complaining about my "oh-so-tiring" existence as a stay-at-home mother. Just see my last post for a refresher.

Well, I quickly snapped out of it this weekend after reading a short news article in the Toronto Star. We've all read about them before..."mother charged with abuse after child brought to hospital with two broken ribs..." or "father charged with assault after infant found with bruises on back..." Unspeakable things happen to tiny children every day. It breaks my hearts, as I'm sure it does yours. I don't normally read these articles. I'd rather not know that all this is happening outside my front door.

But this weekend I read one. I read the whole article. And by the end I was sobbing. To sum it up for you, a mother came home to find her two-year old daughter sitting up in bed and crying, her face scalded by hot water to the point that her eyelids were sollen shut and large sores were forming, while the girl's father sat in the living room watching TV.

The man claimed it was an accident. He argued that he didn't have any money to take the little girl to the hospital in a cab. So, instead, he watched TV while this innocent little girl sat alone in her bedroom, crying, burning, wondering what she had done to deserve such a fate and knowing that she couldn't find any sympathy or love in the man who sat out in the living room. This tiny toddler stayed in her little bed, in pain, for hours, until her mommy came home and took her to the hospital. I cannot fathom how someone can hurt a small child and leave them to suffer just steps away. Even worse, I can't even begin to imagine what deep sadness that child must have felt, knowing that her own father wouldn't do anything to help her. I hope I never come close to experiencing such an emotion.

I read this and all I wanted to do was wake Kaylin up from her nap and hug her and tell her I love and tell her that her mommy and daddy will never, ever let something like this happen to her.

I also felt a renewed joy in being a mother. I have the energy, the will, and the resources to give my child a wonderful life. How lucky am I? So many parents don't and so they lash out the only people they know can't fight back - their children.

I guess I just want to sa that I'm in a particularly thankful spirit right now. I'm "snapping out" of my tired-mom mood and I'm going to keep trying to be the best mom I can be. Because that's what every child deserves, especially my own.

At least I'm not alone

It's 2pm on a Thursday afternoon and I'm frustrated, tired and annoyed. It's one of those days where I wish I worked outside of the home just so I could get a coffee break. It's Kaylin's nap time but she has been bouncing around in her crib for over 40 minutes now. Meanwhile, I'm in the next room losing my mind.

Yes, staying at home with Kaylin has its definite advantages. I don't miss a single moment of her day. I get to do all sorts of fun and interesting things with her. We sometimes hang out in our PJs until 10am. And I can get a hug and a kiss from her any time I want. I really do love it.

But, as I explained to Brian the other day, being a stay-at-home mom is like any job. There are days that you love your job and days that you want to quit.

And when someone's been "on the job" for hours on end without any time to stop and have a break, it's not unreasonable for that person to get tired, cranky and irritated--if not a bit irrational--when things aren't goint well. I mean, we've all cursed at the office printer for refusing to print that overdue report, haven't we? So it's completely normal that I might get a little short with my toddler when she exerts her own will and refuses to sleep. Right?

I used to think I was a bad mom because I sometimes got frustrated with Kaylin. But I was relieved and, to be honest, thrilled to find out that the other moms in our playgroup have all felt the same way! Who knew?

That's why I look sooooo forward to getting together with other moms on a regular basis. It's comforting to open your front door to find that same tired, "I-hardly-slept-last-night" look in someone else's eyes. It's nice knowing that you're not alone in the sometimes-scary world of child-rearing. And it can be scary, let me tell you!

Well, it's been almost a full hour of crib-bouncing. I think I've lost my coffee break today. I'd better go spring the toddler from her "prison" so we can carry on with our day. Maybe I'll get that break tomorrow. Maybe not.

Kaylin sings the hits!

I've wanted to post this video for a few weeks, but our MovieMaker software has been down for a while. Without further adieu, here's Kaylin singing one of her favourite songs, "Down By The Bay", which, incidentally, she learned from riding around in mommy's car with the Raffi CD blaring.

Turn it up loud!

Happy 2nd Birthday Baby Doll!

Wow, how time flies. Two years ago this morning, I was sitting in the living room of our old house, timing my contractions together with your father's help, completely unaware of how drastically our lives were about to change. I would have never guessed then that two short years later you would become the most amazing person I had ever met.

Today you are two years old! (I actually have a two year old!) I've said it before and I'll say it again, your new toddler sentences blow me away. Last night, in the bath tub, you told me you needed a towel. I don't even know if you've said the word "towel" before.

I can't even recall a time when you didn't speak in sentences...how did we communicate three months ago? How did I know that you needed or wanted anything? How quickly I forget.

Possibly better than sentences, however, is the singing. I love your singing! I could just eat you up when you sing "bicycle!" at the top of your lungs to Queen's "Bicycle Race". You've helped me get over my own fear of singing in public. Now we happily belt out tunes as we stroll through the grocery store or walk through the park.

I don't care who hears me, I'm just enjoying my duet while you'll still sing with me. One day you'll say what I used to say to my mother all the time: "Mom, don't sing!" Until then, we will sing and sing loudly!

I could go on, but I know that these wonderful times are just the tip of the iceberg of what we have to look forward to together. Happy birthday Kaylin. Even though you are two years old now, and you're more a little girl than a baby, you'll always be my "baby doll".

Love, mommy

Who are you and what did you do with my baby?

I'm not sure what happened. Kaylin went to sleep one night a baby and woke up the next morning a little person! All joking aside, the past few weeks have seen some of the most amazing changes in Kaylin. She's changed so much and so quickly and, while it's the funnest thing in the world to watch, it also makes me a little sad to see my "baby" gone for good!

Over the past few weeks, she's begun speaking in full sentences, the most common of which begins with "I want...". My favourite request today was, "I want apple juice in a cup." (Because apparently she disliked the juice box I had offered her earlier.) Her imagination is blossoming before our eyes. She tells us stories about all sort of people and events...both real and fictional...all day ("Dinosaurs fly in sky" she tells me, referencing the dino-shaped hot air balloon we saw last night). She lets me know when she doesn't feel well ("Mommy, my 'beddy' hurts!"). She sings full songs, the most hilarious of which is "Down By the Bay", which tonight included the line, "Did you ever see daddy kissing a goose?"

She's becoming very sensitive to people's emotions, particularly crying babies she hears in the mall ("Baby's cry-ning! She needs sooder!") She's learning the rules and enforcing them on her own ("No pushing daddy!") And she's started asking about things around her, such as "What's that?" or "Who's that?"

And finally, as you can see in the picture above, she put her own boots on today! (On the wrong feet, mind you, but I wasn't even in the room and she did it all by herself!) She looks pretty proud, doesn't she?

Brian and I can't get over how quickly she's developing at this stage. She blows our mind on a daily basis and more often than not, makes us cry from laughter at the things one tiny toddler can dream up.

"That dad"

Brian asked me tonight why I haven't updated my Blog this week. I told him that I couldn't think of anything to write about. He rightly suggested that I might want to mention what a fantastic father he is.

Well, I thought that was obvious to the world. But perhaps I should elaborate.

Did you know that since I've become a stay-at-home-mom, Kaylin has become, at times, VERY attached to me? So much that when Brian comes down for breakfast or comes home for dinner, Kaylin often runs to me and hugs my leg until she gets used to the idea that daddy is there. Sounds awful, but it only lasts a minute because every single time, Brian does everything in his power to make his little girl giggle or smile, or join him on the sofa, or colour a picture with him. He knows it's just a phase she's going through and doesn't let it bother him. He doesn't use her behaviour as an excuse to make a quick exit and watch TV or do some work. No, each time, he hangs in there, gets in her face, and let's her know that he loves her. He demands kisses and hugs, he asks her how she is and how her day was, and lets her know that he missed her. And if that fails, he tickles her. He doesn't have to feel bad or left out because he knows that within seconds, Kaylin will be squealing with laughter and it will be because of something he did.

Did you know that Brian is "that dad"? You know the one. The one who is a big kid himself. The one who has all the other kids at the party gathered around, laughing with him, playing with him. The one who picks up his daughter and swings her around until she is howling with laughter. The one who all the moms at the mall grin at because he is having such a great time with his little girl and it shows. The one who won't hesitate to roll around on the ground with his toddler or do Muppet impersonations during bath time.

He's the one who lies on his back on the grass beside his two-year-old daughter, points up to the sky and teaches her to see stars and airplanes with her imagination.

Yep, he's really "that dad".

WHATCHA DOOO-ING???

In the spirit of one of Kaylin's favourite new questions, "whatcha doing?", here are some recent pictures of what she's been doing lately.

Enjoying a FREE! Passion Flakie Mousse at Sunfest last weekend. Ahhh, lard and sugar.


Playing with her "new to her" kitchen. I bought it sight-unseen from someone online. It's in good shape, though the sounds no longer work and none of the accessories were included. But watching her yell "stoppit!!" at the microwave door that won't stay shut made the $25 well worth it.



Watching the men who are STILL pushing dirt around the back of our lot. But this is it! The sod is going in tomorrow morning! Yayyy.



Helping daddy make a blueberry-banana smoothie (or "smoodie"). We now consider the banana "smoodie" one of Kaylin's four major food groups, along with macaroni and cheese, toast, and ice cubes.

Toddler travel highs and lows

Call me a wimp, but I find traveling with the toddler stressful and tiring. And we only went away for one night!!

Brian and I took Kaylin to Niagara Falls this week for a quick little vacation. Looking back, we had a wonderful time. The weather was beautiful and Kaylin was such a good little girl. But I'm still glad to be home.

Here are some highlights and not-so-highlights from our 28-hour trip.

Highs

1. Kaylin got her first glimpse of the stunning Niagara Falls.
2. Kaylin saw killer whales, beluga whales, and seals up close. She got to touch both deer and a snake!
3. Brian and Kaylin had their first real swim together in the hotel pool.
4. Kaylin enjoyed her first taste of cotton candy.
5. Wonderful memories to last a life time.

Lows

1. Kaylin didn't care about the Falls. She preferred to go up and down the nearby stairs then look at the amazing sites around us. Oh well, maybe next time.
   
2. Kaylin fell asleep at 6pm, just as we checked into the hotel. Instead of the three of us going out for dinner as planned, Brian and I quietly ate Chinese take-out on the sofa in our hotel room while Kaylin slept.
3. Kaylin hardly ate anything all weekend. We even opted for a breakfast buffet one morning, thinking she would certainly be tempted by something delicious. Instead, she danced around our table and refused every morsel we offered, except for a few spoonfuls of oatmeal.
4. Marineland has barely changed since 1979. And yet it dares to charge $40 per person admission.
5. Some bold seagulls took Brian's BBQ chicken right off his plate less than 20 seconds after he sat down at our outdoor table. Combine this with the exorbitant price of that crappy lunch and the cranky, not-eating toddler at our side, and this moment was the low point of our trip.

All joking aside, we had a lot of fun on our little jaunt but look forward to a time when Kaylin is just a little older and can enjoy all the sights and sounds a vacation has to offer without falling asleep every four hours.

Here are a few snapshots from the trip.

For BRoqq

Who IS this BRoqq character, anyway?

Here's your pic, BRoqq.

The big weigh-in

Well, we did it. We fattened Kaylin up enough this past month to satisfy the doctor that she can, in fact, gain weight like a normal toddler. We've gone nearly bankrupt buying massive amounts of yogurt and cream cheese, but it was worth it. Now she doesn't have to undergo any blood work and I don't have to be grilled by the pediatric dietitian. For now.

In other exciting news, we're finally taking Kaylin to Niagara Falls. Yes, it will be nice for her to see the Falls, one of the Seven Forgotten Natural Wonders of the World (exactly who forgot about them??). But Brian and I are equally excited about taking her to Marvel Superheroes Adventure City and the Hershey Store, respectively. Hey, those things are important too!

Ooooh, that's scary!

Kaylin "The Ham", as we sometimes call her, is well on her way to becoming a Hollywood star. Here is her latest - something we call the "scary face", though it's really the "scared" face Kaylin makes when she's pretending to be frightened by something.

I'm thinking Oscar Award winner, 2024.

Happy (belated) Father's Day...

...to the best daddy in the world!

Kaylin loves her some books

Here's Kaylin "reading" one of her picture books. I'm not sure what the hurry is, but she always reads this one really fast.

Enjoy.

A bit of mother guilt

Despite what this Blog might have you believe, the life of Kaylin isn't always wine and roses. No, Kaylin actually faces a number of issues which continue to make her life an uphill battle. The main problem (at least as I see it) is ME, her own mother. Maybe it's just a little of what I call "mother guilt," but I feel the need to confess a few roadblocks I've inadvertently placed in the way of K's healthy development.

1. I'm negligent.

Case in point, Kaylin fell into the fountain at the mall last week. I turned my head for a second and in she went. After I yanked her out, I laughed. I laughed my head off for two minutes. OK, so the water was only about 2 inches deep and she only got her shoes and the front of her dress wet, but still...I was being a bad mother.

2. I'm letting her brain turn to mush.

Since we moved, I've done what I always swore I wouldn't do: let my child watch too much TV. (See the picture above. Not only is she staring mindlessly at the TV, but she's in the laundry basket, with laundry on her head!) Maybe I'm not being strict enough and should learn to say "no" more or maybe I just really like watching Dora the Explorer. I'm not sure. But either way, I'm being a bad mother.

3. I'm letting her waste away.

This one may be serious, it's too early to tell. K's doctor is worried because she's not putting on much weight. Yes, she's a thinner toddler. But she's always been long and lean. He's instructed me to give her all the fattening dairy she can eat and don't worry so much about those pesky low-cal fruits and veg. (Never thought I'd hear a doctor tell me that!) Anyway, it's been two weeks now and she hasn't gained an ounce. On one hand, I'm not worried because she's happy, healthy, and smart as a whip and clearly developing well. On the other hand, the mother guilt is becoming all-consuming to the point where I almost break down in tears when she refuses the odd meal. It must be my cooking, the type of yogurt I buy, the way I spread the cream cheese on the toast, the time I serve dinner at....it must be that I'm being a bad mother.

Sigh.

So there you have it. It's off my chest and I feel better already. Thanks for listening. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think Dora is about to start.

Good times (or as K would say, "goot-a goot-a goot-a")

There are a million recent Kaylin happenings I want to write about but I realize most of you wouldn't read past #329. So here's a brief pictorial list of just some of the fun times K's been partaking in lately.


Playing with all her new friends including Emelia, Cordelia, Paige, and Jacob (below), who Kaylin prefers to call "Jacob-a". Don't ask me.




Playing with her not-so-real friend (though she will name her when you ask her who her friends are) , Sally Sidesaddle, her pink-cowboy-hat-wearing hand puppet.




Running up and down the hills at the park/pond at the end of our street. And if she spots a goose, calling "come goose!!" until the goose flies away in fear.




Hanging at the park. Note, according to Kaylin during her most recent visit to this park, this car is HERS!!!! Other children should try to stay away from it when Kaylin is in the vicinity. I'm surprised she's even allowed these ne'er-do-wells to hitch a ride.




BBQing it up with all her Thornton relatives this holiday Monday, including cousin Bradyn (all the way from BC!), below. Now, you may think Kaylin is attempting a choke hold on her younger cousin, but she is actually going in for a big hug. I swear.




Watching the hot air balloons fly behind our house at dawn. This must be why Kaylin has started getting up at the crack of dawn, to catch those hot air balloons.

A little off the top please

Inspired by her cousin Bradyn, Kaylin decided it was high time she visit the local beauty parlour for her first haircut. The curls were starting to get a little out of control and mommy wasn't about to scar her child for life by giving her a bad 'do.

This morning we went to Max and Oskar's, a hair salon just for kids. As it was Friday morning, the shop was empty and Kaylin had her choice of fun chairs to sit in, including an airplane, a car, and a motorcycle. But instead, she chose mommy's lap. I began to worry that this was not going to end well. Thankfully we brought along a favourite DVD to watch in the personal player which helped immensely. Kaylin was quiet as a mouse. Ten minutes later, my cutie was sporting shorter, curlier hair and a fancy new hair clip.

While I enjoyed having someone else cut her hair, the best part for Kaylin was probably the balloon she received at the end. She was quite thrilled. Who wouldn't be?

To celebrate her first foray into the world of overpriced haircuts, we met daddy at the newly-opened Cora's for a tasty lunch. While there we celebrated the world of overpriced waffles. Yummy.

Three cheers for good hair!!

Kaylin the fish

As part of my "keep the toddler busy and away from the TV" strategy, I signed Kaylin and myself up for weekly swimming lessons at a local pool. It's her first experience with swimming, outside of the tiny baby pool we bought for her last year.

I was worried how she would take to the pool, considering hair washing has become a major ordeal lately. But after a few minutes of whining and clinging tightly to my neck, Kaylin relaxed a bit. She even blew bubbles in the water.

Sadly, she seems to be regressing in her aquatic development. Today, during our third trip to the pool, she refused to do almost anything but cling tightly to my neck and squeal "mommmeeeeeee!" I'm not sure what happened to cause her to lose her water confidence again. Do you think it could have something to do with the time during our second week when I accidentally dunked her whole head under water? I'm not so sure.

Maybe next week will be better. Here are a few pics of Kaylin in her bathing suit, or "bay-da-soo" as she calls it. Please ignore the socks!

So what career are you changing to??

As some of you know, I'm fulfilling a lifelong dream and finally taking a cake decorating course. Yes, I know, it's not a major, life-altering accomplishment, but it's something I've always wanted to try. It's fun and I get to lick icing off my fingers during class. How great is that?

Tonight, the woman who sits across the table from me during our cake decorating class each week asked me what I do. When she asked this, my heart skipped a beat. I had been dreading this moment for some time -- the first time a stranger asked me what I do for a living.

I had always wondered how I would react when someone asked me this. Would I beam, "I'm a stay-at-home mom and I love it!!" (which is the truth) or would I act nervous and embarrassed because I still worry how my new "job" looks to other working women?

Tonight I got my answer and I'm ashamed to say it was the latter. I stammered back to her, "What do I do? As in work?? Oh, I'm a stay-at-home mom." But then I felt the need to qualify my statement with "I just left my job a few months ago to make a career change," as if she would think better of me because, until recently, I was like her...I had a REAL job.

She then replied, "oh, so what career are you changing to?" She actually asked me this twice, because she didn't seem to understand that my new career WAS being a stay-at-home mom.

The entire exchange left me annoyed -- annoyed with myself that I'm still so worried about how other people perceive me and my decision to stay home with my child. Since when do I care about other people's view of me? All that matters is my daughter and how this is the best decision I could make for her and our family, right now.

I know I'm going to face this same situation again many times in the future. And it's still going to be tough for me to answer, at least the first few times. But I'm determined to give a better answer. I'll just muster up my confidence, stick close to my values, and try again to proudly announce, "I'm a stay-at-home mom!"

I think I'll also add, "And I like decorating cakes!!"

A fairytale morning in Storybook Gardens

When I was a little girl, no summer was complete without a family trip to Storybook Gardens, a "theme park" here in London. Storybook isn't an amusement park by any means, it's a theme park - the theme of which is fairy tales and children's stories. It's changed a lot since I was little. The Hickory Dickory Dock clock is gone, as is the Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dee cutouts (if you don't know what I'm talking about, sorry, but just trust me, they're gone). The park also seems a LOT smaller. But I guess it's me who has grown.

Anyway, I digress. Now that I live here in London, I get to visit Storybook Gardens as often as I want!! And even better, I get to take my own little girl. We had our first visit to Storybook Gardens this past Sunday. It was a beautiful day for what I'm sure is just the first of many trips to the park.

Kaylin loved chasing the ducks and peacocks around. (She's like a dog, that way.) She also liked the giant frogs. As for me, I just loved seeing my baby girl enjoy the same sights and scenes I too enjoyed as a child.